I don't like the word "hate", so I don't use it lightly. But I really, really, really don't like clothes shopping. I am truly a jeans and t-shirt gal. If it's comfortable and functional, I'm happy.
It gets discouraging finding something cute, or stylish, and trying to find it in my size, which, depending on the store is anywhere from a size 2 to a size 10. Kind of like the "Scale of Lies", this always does wonders for my self-esteem. Size 2? Whoo-hooo! All that working out is paying off! Size 10? What? Did I sleep all last week, and eat 2 trays of brownies? Keep in mind, this is all on the same day of trying things on - just depends on the style, and the store.
You know where this is going.
Our 13th wedding anniversary is tomorrow. The gift for 13 is apparently textile or lace. I went with lace. . .specifically, lace undergarments.
It has been a loooooong time since I've purchased undergarments that were not advertised with selling points like "moisture wicking" and "duct tape like support for the girls".
So, walking into Victoria's Secret (in my running spandex, sweaty race shirt and sports bra) - was like, well, entering a foreign country. I didn't know the language, the currency, the customs, if you will. Seven seconds into the store, I had at least 3 different sales women ask if I wanted help (is there a neon sign with blinking arrow following me around that reads, "Has NO IDEA and needs serious lingerie help!?)
I walked through the store looking at styles and materials. I felt lost. Where were the "comfort spandex" and the "running support" items? What was this satin padded demi-cup, with removable inserts?! Removable inserts? Is there now a new grown-up version of stuffing your bra?
I finally find one bra that is not equipped with excess padding. It is kind of pretty and lacy. I am gaining some confidence. I decide to mosey over to the underwear tables to try and find a pair that doesn't make me feel like I have a perma-wedgie. As I am scanning my options, one of the sales women asks, "Would you like the matching panties for that bra?" What? Matching panties? You don't deal with these kinds of issues and choices at the Running Store! "Do I have to buy the matching panties?" I ask the sales woman. This results in a group laugh session from all the women who hear this conversation. Apparently, No - one does not have to buy the matching panties in order to buy the bra. Glad I could provide comic relief for the staff and patrons at Victoria's Secret.
Bra and panties found. Lace, check. No extra padding, check. Enough bottom coverage to not result in major discomfort throughout the evening, check. Hopefully, happy husband? This better be a check!
Okay, I can do this. I can do this for my husband. I can do this in the name of celebrating 13 years of marriage. I can give my husband the gift of a "lady" for a night at dinner, and not a "runner mom".
He better appreciate this sacrifice. If not, perhaps I could consider a career in comic relief shopping assistant?
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