My latest workout: Reconnecting

So, I've been a Bad Mommy.

I'm righting that wrong, though. . .and it is my newest workout.

I always joke with people that when I am done with my running, spinning, bootcamp, biking, etc. that I then go onto my second workout of the day: Motherhood.  I joke no more - it is truly a workout.

Let me share a story with you about my motherhood. . .Get comfortable, this is going to make you feel like Parent-of-the-Year:
Whenever I go to Target (or out in public), I stare enviously at what seems like all other parents.  They are able to walk through the stores, sipping their Starbucks, with their children following along quietly with them.  I watch as they peruse the shelves for the item they need, able to read labels, and choose the item they want.  They talk to their children in tones that no one else can hear.  It's like the Twilight Zone, to me. . .Because the way I see myself in Target, is frantic mother - who has pre-mapped out the store, prior to the visit, organized my grocery list, by aisles, so there is no wandering around looking for anything.  Get what I need, get out.  In the meantime, my children are running wild, and by running wild, I mean, running wild.  I am yelling in that deep, "You get over here now and walk with me," voice that is not really a yell, but might as well be. . .My 7 year old asks for at least one item from each aisle, even though I always refuse to buy anything that isn't on the list, and he never has his own money.  My 9 year old is apparently an old man trapped in a young boys body, because we are not even five minutes in the store, and his feet hurt, or his legs hurt, and why do they have to come to the store with me, and is it time to leave yet?  I wish.

Now, I have just given the grocery shop as one example, but it's pretty much accurate for any public outing with my children.  It's exhausting.

So, being the Bad Mommy that I am, I have relied heavily on electronics.  I realize now, that was for my sanity, but of no help to my children.  Now, I've read the research.  I know a lot of screen time isn't good for kids.  During the school year, my kids only get 1 hour a day, after homework is done.  It can be TV, iPod, or computer, or some combination of all three, but only 1 hour.  Yet, if we went out to dinner, I let my kids take their iPods, so that I could actually have a meal in semi-peace.  Or, if I needed to make a phone call at home, I would let them have their iPods, in the hopes that I could have an uninterrupted conversation.

Are you reading all that carefully?  Because I had my head stuck in the sand.  I was doing all that for ME.  I was trying to give myself a break by giving my kids electronics.  It's not fair to them.

So, I got a kick in the rear this past week.  We are debating on enrolling our 9 year old at Brain Balance.  It is an "achievement center" that helps kids with certain issues (he has quite a few), gain more control over their behaviors, and help with academics.  Brain Balance strongly recommended that we limit electronic time to 1 hour a day, even in the summer (we were doing much more than that now that school is out). 

We started this past week, and it has been a lesson for me in reconnecting with my kids.  An important lesson.  An exhausting lesson.  It is truly my second workout of the day - and it lasts all day.

This past year I tutored a wonderful 5th grade girl, who also had a younger sister.  I kid you not, but I showed up on one occasion and they were sitting quietly outside having a tea party.  A tea party!  Sitting quietly!  Another time, I showed up, and they had just finished beautiful art projects that involved paint and glitter.  The house was spotless.

My husband and I joke about tea parties.  You come to my house, and the kids are dismantling the furniture.  At least one of them is climbing up on something.  They truly climb up walls.

I am scared to even bring glitter, glue, and paint into my home, because you can bet your next paycheck it won't be used for a beautiful art project.  Unless you count our walls and floors, possibly some linens, and almost guaranteed the sofa and carpet, as "art" projects.

This is not bad though - it is a good thing.  Right?  It has made me much more aware of being present - my presence - with my children.  It is challenging us to be creative with our time.  I am enjoying this - and my kids are doing quite well with the transition!  I think it has been a good workout for all of us.  Except, I don't want them to be too creative with their time:

I am referring to this as Operation W.I.N.E. (Wii, iPod, No Electronics).  We are all up by 8am.  My kids talk from the moment they wake up until they pass out at night.  Every thought that comes into their heads comes out of their mouths.   There is no quiet.  I could get them quiet with electronics, but Operation W.I.N.E. is in effect. . .and I feel that sometimes, with the constant chattering, it is pushing me towards Operation WINE (as in, give me a drink right now).  Of course, now, it's turning into Operation WHINE (ha ha). . .

Seriously, I am glad to have gotten this back under control.  I am glad that my children are embracing Operation W.I.N.E. more than fighting it.  We are spending time at the pool, at the tree fort, outside playing, parks and playgrounds, even baking together.  My kids are actually (slightly) more calm without all the electronics throughout the day.  It's healthier this way, for all of us.

And wine is a fruit, right, so it's healthy?