Teachable Moments.

Parenthood.  What a trip.

This past weekend was my husband's 40th birthday.  We went away for a long weekend, and it was a wonderful family time.  For the most part.

I think I've mentioned before - my kids are wide open.  They have endless energy and talk non-stop.  One of the most difficult issues I confront as a parent are the constant, split-second decisions that must be made - all day long. 

There are individual lessons, specific to each child, and basically, minor, for example:  My 7 year old has a habit of using scissors to snip off the ends of those plastic yogurt tubes, and then leaving them on the floor - or wherever else they may fall.  For the longest time, I would just clean it up, along with my regular floor sweeping.  However, recently, I realized, "He's going to keep doing this, if I don't stop and make him clean it up himself."  I needed to take the time to teach him that this behavior is not okay, and what my expectation is for trash.

This takes time.  It takes energy.  It takes me frequently repeating myself.  This. Is. Parenthood.

Then, there are the bigger issues and decisions, the ones that affect not only one person, but others. . .I promised my husband I would not document this transgression, as he feels I am creating a digital journal of our son's delinquent activities.  However, I think I can still convey the struggle of Teachable Moments.

 

I went for a run this weekend while we were in the mountains.  I have a two loop route that I run.  While I was running, the boys were out and about on their scooters.  On my final lap, I noticed that one of my children had done something he should not have done. . .As I walked my cool-down home, I found myself thinking, "This is minor.  Do I even bother to bring it up?" conflicted with, "If I don't mention this, he won't learn.  This is a Teachable Moment."  I have to mention it.  I have to use this as a learning opportunity, and I have to follow through with this, as much as I don't want to. . .This. Is. Parenthood.

So, I got home and rounded up all my boys (Dad included), and mentioned what I had found.  My youngest son immediately stepped up and took responsibility, which I totally appreciated.  This was a big step for him, because usually he denies any involvement.  So, I acknowledged that was good that he owned the mistake - but then the lesson?  The consequence?  How to convey the importance of making good choices and being respectful? 

I need a manual.  I need a handbook.  I don't know what I am doing.

Baby Blues 5/2/09

                              "Do you ever feel totally unqualified to be a parent?"
                                                "All the time."
                                               "In fact, the only time I ever felt qualified to be a parent was before I had kids."

These Teachable Moments - these frequent moments in parenting, in life, when we must stop, take a deep breath, and learn.  These moments are not just for my children, they are for me.  We all learn, and it's not always easy. . .but it's worth it, right?